It's Time To Talk About Rape Culture (Part 1)

***Disclaimer: I understand that rape culture is a very widespread topic. And I recognize that there is no one to blame. And I’m not trying to blame anyone, not men, not women. I’m trying to explain to people why they shouldn’t blame others in the first place. I also understand that men can be raped, sexualized, and treated with disrespect because of what is in their pants, and that’s awful and unfair for them, but it’s less common and not the problem I’m addressing today.***

One year for the total violation of someone. One year for exploiting a girl, and a minor, all over various social networking sites. One year for taking said girl to multiple parties where she would be made fun of, humiliated, and shamed. One year for the trauma that will stay with this girl forever. One year for raping someone. 

And that, dear friends, is called rape culture. And it is messed up. In case you didn’t weren’t aware, I am talking about the sentence that two young men from Steubenville, Ohio got after gang raping a young women, who’s identity remains anonymous. 

Rape culture is a definition given to the way society treats rape, all of which are problems.

The first of these starts with the sexualization of women. All throughout history, women have been no more than a set of boobs. Over the past 20 years it’s only gotten worse, after the men in advertising realized that women’s half naked bodies sell products, such as alcohol, cars, and razors. Then, the men in Hollywood realized that since breasts and butts sell these things, maybe this exploitation will sell movies and TV shows and music too! And then, somehow, it became that double D’s will make the average man want anything, or at least give it a couple seconds of is life.

This thinking is a problem within itself. This idea that men must conform to this sort of masculinity, this idea that all men want is sex, is sickening. It’s unfair to them for society to portray them that way. In general, men are good people. Sometimes they do bad things, and they can’t help it, when they’ve grown up with naked women all over their whiskey advertisements. 

From a young age, little boys are shown through media that men are better, men are bigger, men are stronger. Be a man! Be strong! Have muscles!

I watched a lot of Power Rangers growing up. There was always a pink ranger. (with the exception of seasons where there were only 3 rangers then they were red, blue, and yellow but that’s irrelevant) And awesome as the pink ranger was, she was always a bit of a pansy. Didn’t like to get dirty, complained about chipping her nails, crushed on the red ranger. (who, in all my years of watching Power Rangers, has never been a girl) Point is, the girl rangers are just that, girls. Girly girls. Girls who worry about their hair in their helmets and whose uniforms always include little skirts and tight fitting shirts. 

This is a show aimed at boys, and portrays girls as weaker then the boys.

Then these little boys grow up, and watch The Big Bang Theory and while TBBT is hilarious and a great show, the female lead is a pretty blonde, who works at The Cheesecake Factory, because she is a failed actress. We don’t even know her last name.

In media, women are never quite as good as the men, never quite as smart, never quite as strong or as talented or as important. So naturally, in every generation, you’re going to get guys who think they’re better than women, who think they can get away with more. Who think they ahem, deserve, more. But this isn’t their fault. This is what has been written into their brains since they were six years old and singing “Go go Power Rangers! Now now now nah nah nah!”

After dealing with how this affects men, we have to dive into the deeper mess of how media’s portrayal of women affects women. Because it affects them in many ways. It teaches us from a young age that men are smarter, men are stronger, need a bug killed? Find a guy, because you’re a girl, you’re supposed to be scared of bugs. (Of course, if you’re one of my brothers you’re also terrified of bugs and make your sister do all the cockroach smashing. They have one job.)

From a young age we’re taught to care about our looks, we’re taught that good hair is more important than a good brain. We have Toddlers And Tiaras thrown in our face and Barbies cluttering our toy aisles. 

We’re shown that women are supposed to have a handsome princess come whisk us away. We’re taught to sit in castles and wait. We’re supposed to let the men do all the work, well guess what, we shouldn’t let men do all the work. We shouldn’t have to wait in castles, and we shouldn’t be taught that that is the norm.

These gender roles start at birth. They start when the doctor says, “It’s a girl!” and brings you a squirmy thing in a pink blanket. They continue on when this new daughter is brought home to a pink nursery. The little girl is put in headbands and ruffly dresses and big flower bows. Her grandmother knits her a fluffy pink blanket, much like the blue one her older brother has. 

And all throughout girls’ childhoods, what women do and don’t do is placed on them. It starts with baby dolls for their third birthdays, and a toy kitchen for their fourth. It’s “What do you want to name your children when you grow up?”. 

This is never a question asked of young boys, because boys aren’t parents until a birth certificate says so, but girls, girls are mothers from the start. Our bodies were designed to carry children, designed to push em out as well. We have motherly instincts, you might say. 

And though our bodies were made to birth babies, we weren’t all made for motherhood, and the notion that we are, that that is what girls are supposed to be, is ridiculous. 

Even more ridiculous, is how this can damage a girl. Because sometimes people don’t want kids, and that is fine. But if a young women grows up thinking she has to have kids in order to really be a woman, but doesn’t want any, it can inflict a sense of failure on her.

Women are more than bouncing babies on clearly defined, skinny little hips. They’re more than preparing meals for families. 

Women are more than just objects.  And it's about time society as a whole recognizes that.